JOURNALISMING

Lord knows, we're not going to waste our valuable time trying to find out the truth of all this since that would require actual work on our parts.  And since Beijing writes all our crap these days, what's the point of that?  This...is China's Nattering Nitwits CNN.

SYLLOGISM

If you used to work for Old Pen And A Phone, I guess it would be perfectly natural for you to have a soft spot for totalitarianism in all its manifestations.

KIRSTEN?

Take the L, sweetheart.  Just take the L and move on.  Only thing you can do.  Because when you get caught lying through your teeth as blatantly as you did here, when everybody's dunking on you, lamely attempting to cover your tracks by pulling your tweets is pretty much the worst conceivable move you can possibly make.

As things stand now, nobody's ever going to listen to you again.

RAPE, SCHMAPE

Lisa Bloom explains why fat, old, drunken letch Ted Kennedy kept winning all those elections despite having literally killed a young woman.

UPDATE: There was a lot wrong with Ted for a very long time.  Here's a story about Ted's 1980 interview with Roger Mudd that destroyed Ted's presidential run before it began.

IN THE TANK

From a Democratic Party PR shop.

NOTE TO SELF

Make up some "Ready For The Rapture?" T-shirts to sell.

RIGHT TO KNOW

Since he's running for president this year, Joe Biden thinks that the last information the public should be allowed access to is stuff Joe may have done in the past.

FETCH THE NEOSPORIN

Because this is what all the kids these days call a burn.

UPDATE: Kirsten doubles down.

UPDATE: Yup.  All of this.

UPDATE: Mollie Hemingway's guns fire off a broadside.

DEFLECTION

What's stopping you, Jake?

Given the universal hostility of American "journalists" toward the President, the idea that if there was anything there, it would have come out a long time ago comes immediately to mind.  But hey, you've got yourself your own little CNN show and I guess you can have anyone on there that you want so take your best possible shot. 

Hack.

WORD TO THE WISE, BEIJING

Sometimes not even CNN guys can make themselves fake it.